How to Find Stillness Even When You're Busy AF

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How to Find Stillness Even When You’re Busy AF

Today, I am the featured guest on my friend Dave’s GS Nation Podcast. I spent an hour talking about being my own boss, overcoming pain, and my commitment to keeping it real. One of the questions Cary asked me during the podcast was about how I find time for myself. As a week or so has drifted by after the interview, I’ve been thinking about that question the most. I keep coming back to the concept of stillness.

Stillness isn’t a physical state. It’s is a state of mind. You can be running and be still. This is where you are YOU and nothing else. Stillness is a calm acceptance of our own thoughts, feelings and sensations. That’s my “me time.”

As you all know, I am by no means always still. Complicated personal situations, big professional work projects, and physical stress all interrupt my sense of peace. The trick to stillness is knowing I can always find a way back to that feeling. It’s always available to me.

I have a few simple ways I find and experience stillness every day. I wanted to share:

Schedule It In

This may sound counterproductive, but if you are a busy person, scheduling stillness is probably necessary. I schedule in time to workout, to take a nap, or to go for a walk. During those times, I put my phone away. I make sure I can’t reach it. I resist the urge to check my phone for texts, Instagram comments, and emails. They’ll still be there in 30 minutes to an hour. I’ll be in a better state of mind then to respond anyways.

Learn more about some of my favorite fitness routines.

One Breathe Counts

There are endless books, podcasts, blog posts, and more about the power of the breath. My yoga practice has taught me to pay attention to my breath. I can’t says take an hour to focus on my breathing. I can, however, always take one breath no matter where I am or what I’m doing. If I find myself feeling overwhelmed or need to refocus, I take one little moment. I breathe in as deeply as I can through my nose and then exhale as deeply as I can through my mouth. If it’s loud, I don’t give a shit. Let people wonder. If I have time, I’ll do that five to ten times. I immediately feel better afterwards. It brings down my entire blood pressure and erases my mind from whatever was clogging it up. I can then then effectively draw my attention to the present moment. I’m back in tune with myself.

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Forget About Other People

Remember, time is a construct. There are always deadlines looming. Someone will always want something from you. A lot of those deadlines and duties are “urgent” in some people’s minds. Don’t let the culture of “urgency” ruin your sense of self. You are doing what you can. You are good enough. You will get the work done. Stillness is about acceptance. That acceptance is for yourself, about circumstances, and about other people. You can only control your own thoughts and actions.

Close Your Eyes and Listen

A lot of people associate stillness with silence. The reality is, silence doesn’t exist. There are always people talking, cars driving, wind blowing, heaters running, and more. Learn to appreciate the noise. If you have a moment in the office, in the coffee shop, or wherever you are, close your eyes and listen. Name the sounds. Say “Hi” to them. Thank them for being there. Then, remember that you are still separate from them. You exist both with and without them. Be okay with that.

Airplane Mode

Thanks to lunch with a friend this week, I added this one in. I’ve started to put my phone on airplane mode when I need to focus on work and when I sleep. It stops texts, snaps, and news alerts from popping up on my screen. It prevents the feeling of overwhelm when I wake up when I see a bunch of new notifications. I only turn it back on now when I’m mentally and physically awake and ready to jump in and focus on work. In terms of stillness, this tech hack has made my life so much better.

Block It Out and Jam

This advice is on the flip side of listening. Sometimes you have to go inward. You have to forget about the world around you so you can focus on yourself or the task at hand. I’ve been a bit evangelical about my wireless headphones. I keep a few pairs around my apartment and in my favorite bags. I pop them in whenever I need to refocus my energy or hone in on a deadline. I have a playlist for every mood: Night Rain for relaxation, a “Sunny Day” playlist for when I need to just dance around and feel happy, and electronic dance vibes for when I need to power through some work. One song sometimes does the trick to still your soul.

Find Your Spot

Where is the place in your house, your office, your neighborhood that makes you feel safe? Where do you head when you are overwhelmed? For me, it’s the James River behind my apartment. It’s a less than a 10-minute walk from my pace. My bed is also my favorite spot. It’s like a little nest waiting just for me whenever the world gets too uncomfortable. I pay attention to how it looks and feels. I invest in making it comfortable and inviting, even when I don’t need to sleep.